https://blog.spacehey.com/user?id=2942094The most recent Blog Entries by the User "xX_matthias.maximus_Xx" on SpaceHeyhttps://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1357883https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1357883i live in the rural US, however, i live in the largest city in this very rural state. recently, my partner and i renewed our lease in our apartment for 14 months, which is great! we love the location, and we are just about 3 blocks outside of the historic downtown.  BUT, here is evidence that the economy will be getting worse before it gets better. when we originally signed, the complex required 3...Sun, 12 Jan 2025 22:12:04 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1353163https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1353163i'm 22. i'm about to graduate college this may. i won't see my friends regularly, and most of them will be moving away. i won't have a built in network of artists i meet with to share work like i do in my classes. i won't have the built in ability to progress towards a goal through doing what i love. and the job market SUCKS ASS oh my lord. in the US, there's basically no way to move up in the wor...Wed, 08 Jan 2025 14:36:34 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1351657https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1351657i got bored af at work and started making these dumbass collages. pls use them on ur blogs with credit if possible!!Tue, 07 Jan 2025 06:08:56 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1349012https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1349012this is only semi-political, but i'd love to get some feedback and discussion with others. i have a severe and difficult to manage personality disorder. at my worst, i have been a VERY bad person. someone who was drinking, doing certain substances, lying, not working or going to class, etc. i have borderline personality disorder, and i was diagnosed about 2 years ago. i've been seen and had my dia...Sat, 04 Jan 2025 18:28:10 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1347014https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1347014this is completely subjective, but i am curious about public perception to this. i stopped partying after turning 21 simply because i was sick and tired of being hungover, drunk, etc. and now, at nearly 23, i can't imagine going back to partying. my partner and i went out for new years and neither of us drink or do any illicit substances. we got to talking about how old is too old to be clubbing/p...Thu, 02 Jan 2025 16:47:34 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1346350https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1346350hey cuties,  i do a tarot reading on the first day of each new year, and since it's all snowy and wet where i'm at, i decided to make it a whole event for the day!! i lit some candles, and laid out my tarot mat. this mat is energetically cleansed, so i'm able to do a reading anywhere. i focus on mediating on one randomly drawn card at either the beginning or end of a session, just to give myself a...Wed, 01 Jan 2025 23:52:19 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1343740https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1343740it's getting bad again. i can feel it. it's hidden in the waking up at 3 pm. it's hidden in the fact that a shower feels like a pilgrimage; i know it will cleanse me, but at what sacrifice. i'm not reading. i'm not writing. i'm not doing much of anything.  as a very mentally ill person, i've been here many times. and i've been able to get out of them all (somehow). here are the steps to fix it: st...Mon, 30 Dec 2024 00:04:19 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1342959https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1342959heyyy besties it's almost 2025 I'm going to be making a non-comprehensive list of what I hope to achieve in the new year, especially since putting it here on a site i use a lot may help me to actually check in on those goals more regularly Financial Goals: -I want to get a 3 month emergency fund built up before 2026 ($4000 approx. in savings) -I want to use my debit card as much as possible, hopef...Sun, 29 Dec 2024 01:03:16 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1342265https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1342265does anyone else feel like there's a constant glooming pressure of death hehe I feel like the moment I let my mind wander, there's this immediate drawing to things that are dark, and considered sad/taboo in most circles. I don't want to always be the friend bringing up Kafka or Camus, but I really can't understand how people are able to exist every day without a constant nagging of pain and sadnes...Sat, 28 Dec 2024 02:07:36 +0000https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1342067https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1342067hey my cuties,  my name is Matti, and I'm living as a disabled person in the US, meaning I'm basically in the unlocked tenth circle of hell.  I have borderline personality disorder and major depressive disorder, which I was diagnosed with in 2022 after a hospital stay. I was diagnosed with multiple physical ailments this year, including: -fibromyalgia -chronic fatigue syndrome -adult onset asthma ...Fri, 27 Dec 2024 21:12:55 +0000