Blog Entries by "ftwillz" | SpaceHeyhttps://blog.spacehey.com/user?id=2950113The most recent Blog Entries by the User "ftwillz" on SpaceHeyall i want to be is a box in the most inner depths of the closet in an abandoned house.https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1884793https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1884793no one to witness the blunt corners of my being or my head full of dust,Wed, 20 Aug 2025 22:40:05 +0000the dog metaphor / i know a life of exsanguination is the only life for mehttps://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1346308https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1346308the gnawing at stitchesWed, 01 Jan 2025 22:57:47 +0000the machine's song is as sweet as the earth that holds it and its blood as red as the inside of the hands that made ithttps://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1338940https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1338940a computer is an organism, in a way, it's a body. you can reach inside the inner walls of its being  you can feel the soft rubber of the cables on your skin as they tangle all across your fingers you can feel them pull on your skin  you can make the tips of your fingers travel across the surface of a motherboard  you can softly caress the inductors and its bumps  you can feel the shy burn of its i...Mon, 23 Dec 2024 17:48:40 +0000a dream i had the other nighthttps://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1336899https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1336899i dreamt i sleepwalked at 5 am through the streets by the golf course. i could hear the birds already singing and the sound of disembodied voiSat, 21 Dec 2024 10:42:01 +0000the highgate cemetery has reached full capacity and i am not going back homehttps://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1335440https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1335440i see myself as more of a graveyard than a person, the way i feel the dirt suffocating me and the casket keeping me in place and the different stages of decomposition switching up  for hours at a time. what im trying to say is that i feel just as stuck and dead as a plethora of cadaThu, 19 Dec 2024 11:38:38 +0000there is nothing i want more than to run headfirst into the wall you helped me buildhttps://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1334758https://blog.spacehey.com/entry?id=1334758i look for things in places where i know im not gonna find them and sigh with secret satisfaction at the realization that the alleyway has no exit and that the plate is empty. i want to be trapped and to be hungry just as much as i want to escape and have my fill; which is to say: with every fiber of my being, which is to say: completeWed, 18 Dec 2024 15:45:14 +0000